Imagine you’re sitting at a table with a stack of 50 $50 bills in front of you.

Across the table sits a man with a stack of 50 nickels.

“OK, let’s cut to the chase here,” the man says. “You cut your stack down to five, I’ll cut my stack down to five, then we’ll trade and call it even.”

You, of course, aren’t buying this argument. You tell him if he wants five of your $50 bills, he’ll have to give you 5,000 nickels. The man fusses and fumes, telling you that you’re completely unreasonable.

This is what contract negotiations are like. Former General Manager Bob Wilson used to push Guild bargainers to come quickly down to their “short list,” the top priorities, so that the Company could then swap with the top priorities on its list. The problem, of course, is that the Guild’s list would include items like a bump in the night differential or a modest increase in the pension contribution. The Company’s short list would include things like eliminating your right to consent to getting your days off changed or allowing you to be displaced and an independent contractor to get your job (and, in advertising, commissions.)

Keep this in mind as you look at our initial proposal. You’ll probably notice that it’s full of nickels. Some of them are items we are quite serious about obtaining this year, some are things we’d like to get sometime and some are there in case the Company demands we hand over a stack of $50’s. How swiftly we whittle down our pile will depend not on how many items are on the Company’s agenda, but the value of what they want. The less they demand, the sooner we can get a fair contract.

The wait is over. We’ve got bargaining dates. We’ll be meeting all day on Tuesday, June 24, starting at 2 p.m. Wednesday, June 25, and all day on Thursday and Friday, June 26 and 27. By then, the Company should be thoroughly convinced and in fact decide to give us even bigger raises than we propose.

OK, so it might not go that fast. In fact, traditionally we don’t propose wage increases, upgrades or negotiated commissions until later. We first try to get as many of the non-economic issues off the table as we can first.

This year’s committee will include Local President Tim O’Brien, Mary Fultz of Editorial, Stacy Wood of Advertising and John DeMania of Circulation. International Representative Jim Schaufenbil will again be joining us with his wit, wisdom and good advice.

To those who have been through this before, we know we can rely on your support. To people who have been hired since the current contract was bargained, you’re about to get a close-up view of the benefits of having a union.

As always, the strength of any contract we get is not based solely on the eloquence of our bargaining committee. It is through the activism of our membership. United, we’re strong.

As of Friday, 22 people had applied for the buyout. The Company has now enhanced the offer, giving three years’ health insurance to employees with 25 or more years with the Company.

Publisher Mark Aldam told the Guild on Friday that he heard from several members who wanted to apply but had existing health conditions and feared they could not get insurance or who just could not afford to pay for health care until they became eligible for Medicare.

With the added incentive, the Company should be able to reach its goal of 30 employees taking the buyout. Naturally, the Guild is opposed to involuntary layoffs.

The Guild continues to talk to the Company about the proposed newsroom reorganization. Many of the proposals are fine, others will require more discussion and clarification and a few are problematic. The union will oppose what has become a disturbing trend at the paper lately — an effort to convert Guild-covered positions into exempt management ones. The Guild will oppose any effort to take away our work; we don’t need more managers supervising the same (or fewer) employees.

This issue is cropping up all over the plant, including the “design director” position in marketing. That employee is doing work that has been done by Guild members in Specialty Publications. A grievance has been filed. The Company also broke a 20-year agreement when Fred Lebrun retired. The post was to go to the Guild. Instead, the column is being done one day a week by an exempt manager.

Guild members met twice Thursday to hear what the Company is proposing. Your thoughts will be helpful to the Guild in deciding how to respond.

Employees in advertising met this week to air their concerns about their treatment.

It’s been a highly stressful time for the folks who bring in the money. Their commissions have been cut, their names and how close they are to sales goals are being posted for all to see on a board, and the Company has started handing out “performance improvement plans” to veteran sales workers. Worst of all, some salespeople are being told not to call some of their clients if the advertiser hasn’t bought an ad in six months. Instead, it is being classified as “new business” and being given to other salespeople — even if the customer calls up their regular salesperson.

It’s motivating the employees all right: to get active in their union. And the Guild plans to bring these issues to the bargaining table.